Monday, October 11, 2010

Oral Sex...how to give a blowjob

If you feel he is approaching climax (i.e., he’s writhing on the bed, clutching the sheets, moaning like crazy, proposing marriage -- a sure sign you’re doing it right), then you might want to slow the action until he backs away from the imminent orgasm. Then slowly begin to build again. Many great dance and musical performances make use of this strategy, slowly building to near crescendo then backing off and starting slowly and quietly again. Try making use of it in your great performance in bed. Near-orgasm is a wonderful place to be! Try to keep him in that state for as long as possible, without frustrating him.

Some men cannot tolerate slowing down once they are near orgasm. However, often a more patient, experienced lover will adore this sort of dance. The process of building to near-orgasm, then having the action slow, with you whispering “not yet” into his ear in a husky voice as you slowly build the tempo again, may drive him wild. Be especially aware of your partner’s responses during this process. Sometimes a man is past the point-of-no-return, and you must help him come if he seems unable to slow down. Also, even the most patient of lovers will eventually want to enjoy the grand finale. So try to pick up on signs that he is ready to cum.

The moment of truth. Assume the position. Any position that allows you to reach his cock with your mouth is game. But when you’re ready for the finale, if you’re not already in the ultimate position of sexual worship, kneel between his legs. When you sense he is ready to cum, quicken the pace. You should be pumping fast and furiously with your mouth, or your hand if you can’t move fast enough with your mouth. Timing is everything; at this point, DO NOT slow the pace no matter how sore or tired your mouth or hands become. Keep the rhythm going and don’t stop. Make sure you pace yourself during the blowjob so that you can finish with a sprint. Virtually all men enjoy rapid-fire pumping at the end, but some men like it light and others like a firmer hand. Experiment with pressure and speed.

Don’t forget his balls! Many men find testicular stimulation critical as they near orgasm. Some even enjoy having their scrotum tugged hard as they approach climax. Others are driven over the edge by anal, rectal, and/or prostate stimulation. You’ve spent a lot of time learning what he likes, now is the time to give it ALL to him at once!

As he nears orgasm, you will notice changes. His breathing may become quick and shallow, the sounds he has been making may change abruptly, he may arch his back and tense his muscles; he may throw his head back and clutch at you or the sheets. His balls rise so much they become difficult to move with your hand, his shaft will be rock hard, and the head of his cock will become so huge and engorged it feels as if it will burst. Do not stop pumping, and do not slow down! Keep pumping as long as he will let you. For many men the orgasm will be more intense and prolonged if you continue to stimulate them throughout the climax. At some point following orgasm, his cock may become so acutely sensitive that he will only enjoy the gentlest touch, if any. Pay attention to this sudden change.

Swallowing. Most men enjoy it when you swallow their cum. Men who have strong feelings for their lovers in particular may report feelings of intimacy and acceptance when their lovers swallow. One man deeply in love admitted to feeling a “soul injection” when his partner swallows. Although many partners are happy to oblige, some people find it difficult to do. Remember that it is a very small volume of liquid, about a teaspoon or so. The taste of semen is fairly mild, but can vary tremendously from man to man, and even for the same man at different times. If you have difficulty swallowing, you may try holding your breath and swallowing quickly. Some people find deep throating at the moment of ejaculation helpful, as he shoots his load so deep in your mouth that it bypasses the taste buds. If you absolutely cannot bring yourself to swallow under any circumstances, you can try to discreetly spit the semen into a tissue or towel. Or better yet, pull his cock out of your mouth at the last moment and have him ejaculate on your face or body, then make a little erotic show out of spreading his cum onto your body with your hands. Of course, if you are using a condom and you keep it on while he comes, you don’t have to worry about any of this!

Afterward, some men enjoy it if you “milk” their cock by squeezing at the base and then sliding your hand up the shaft toward the head, getting out every last drop of cum and lapping it up. Other men are so sensitive after coming that they cannot stand to be touched. Most enjoy at least having their balls cupped by your hand.

What if he doesn’t come? Not every blowjob will result in ejaculation, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes a blowjob will be part of many sexual activities you enjoy together in a given session. Not all men find it easy to ejaculate, although they may enjoy oral stimulation tremendously. If a man ejaculated recently, he may be unable to come again for a while. As a man ages, ejaculation typically becomes a less frequent occurrence and produces a lower volume of semen, although an older man may have at least as much sexual activity and enjoyment as a younger man. Fatigue, depression, distraction, and certain medications may interfere with a man’s ability to come. Remember, the idea is to enjoy yourselves; there doesn’t have to be a goal or end-point.

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